One child at a time
Lakshmi Mitter
An old man walking on the beach one morning sees a lot of starfish washed ashore. As he walks along the beach he sees a young man at a distance. At first, it seems like the young man is dancing. When he goes closer he realises that the young man isn’t dancing, he is throwing the starfish back into the sea.
The old man asks, “Why are you throwing the starfish into the ocean?” “They will not be able to bear the heat of the sun as time goes by.”
“But there are so many along the coastline. How many can you save? What difference is it going to make?”
The young man bends down, picks up another star fish and throws it into the water. Then he says, “It made a difference to that one starfish.” (This excerpt originates from the famous story The Star Thrower by Loren Eiseley. This story made a big difference in my life.)
As an educator, I want to help every child that attends my sessions realize what they are truly capable of. I teach small groups of children. One of the most important lessons these children have taught me is that everyone is unique. I cannot implement a standard practice or method for all and expect them to learn equally well. I need to listen to them, only then will I learn how to teach them in a way that they can understand. If I must follow this approach, I must accept that it is impossible for me to reach out to all the children and make a difference to each one of them. There are times when this approach can get overwhelming. I feel at a loss when I don’t know how to help a child. My thoughts tend to spiral. I ask myself if I can make a difference to all the children who attend my sessions.
It isn’t easy. It takes time. Every teacher reading this, I am sure, will agree when I say that our patience sometimes runs out. Frustration sets in. What could I do differently to make a difference to many? At such times, the young man in the starfish story comes to my rescue. He always reminds me, “One at a time.” This helps me pace myself. It helps me to focus, actively listen, emote, and understand the child’s perspective. Then comes about a sense of clarity and direction. Conversations follow. We figure a suitable way together. The child gives it a try. Gives up sometimes. The challenge is not to join in in giving up, but offer a helping hand to try again. And when it finally happens, when the child realizes that they are good and don’t need someone to tell them that, it is worth the wait. One child at a time. It is not possible to make a difference to all at the same time. One child at a time, one day at a time.
Lakshmi Mitter has several years of experience writing children’s stories and articles on the importance of raising readers. Her quest to enable children to enjoy reading and derive the multiple benefits thereof led her to write and illustrate over 40 customized children’s storybooks through her venture, MerryGoBooks. Continued efforts in this field led her to establish Talking Circles.Through Talking Circles, she hopes to enable children to express themselves freely, be open to a variety of perspectives, show one another empathy and in the process grow together. She can be reached at lakshmi@talkingcircles.in..
